Because I'm a million miles away inside

Across the Universe:

best musical ever
loved it completely
very trippy
totally cool
IM GOING TO BUY IT THE SECOND IT COMES OUT ON VIDEO.
and watch it a million billion times.

hanging out at my house after:

fun
strange
sexy
strange
horny
strange
rape
strange
i dont regret a thing though
something we should do more often
maybe on wednesday???

This shit is: SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALADOCIOUS! S-U-P-E-R-C-A-L-A-F-R-A-G-A...uh... WHAT!?

the ride there: slow and cautious
the ride back: fast, sweaty and fun

i went home, and then brushed my teeth. I could smell you on my breath the whole ride home. I would have taken a shower, because all of my clothes smell like you, but not at 5 in the morning.
so i just changed clothes. still wearing my jacket, which really wasnt involved, but it smells like your house now.
i had a good time ;]

see you in a few hours love.

and listen,
i know you might want to do some "stuff" during the movie, but i actually want to see this movie. so maybe afterwards.
sorry.

Pick up the phone nobody's home, im all alone, We've all been here before

now i feel even more like shit.

i fell back asleep and didnt sneak out to go see carl. and im sure he's probably mad at me. or dissappointed, again. i dont blame him. i deserve it.

im a horrible person. i went back on my promise, even if it was unintentional. and its not the first time that i dissappointed everyone for not keeping promises. i dont understand why everybody doesnt hate me. i have to be the worst kind of friend.

i woke up and i sat there on the floor in front of my mirror and just tried to think of some way to apologize for what i did. and i realized that no matter what i said, even if it didnt make carl mad, it wouldnt make me hate myself less. i dont deserve anything i have. i dont deserve my friends, or carl, or even the right to be alive right now. and if it wasnt for carl and my friends, i probably wouldnt be.

I'm sorry that im such a dissappointment to you

and im even more sorry that im such a dissappointment to myself.

so i feel like shit

i know you love me carl, but it seems that when your mad or sad, you always know the wrong thing to say. and normally its just little things, and i try not to let it bother me, but sometimes...

it just builds up and i get upset...

like i cant bottle it up anymore because im filled to the brim, and the lid wont screw on just right

i think we really need to talk

and since ill be seeing you in a few hours, i dont think that will be a problem.




im just glad that Dakota was there for me to vent to, unlike some of the other shitty friends i know.

if any of you people are reading this, and think that i am referring to you, i dont feel bitterly about you, im just not in the best of moods, and it will pass in about a minute or two.
so i still love you
im just kind of ticked

And I will remember your name and face, on the day you were judged by the funhouse cast, and I will rejoice in your fall from grace

okay, so i was downloading some free songs from fuse.tv and there was this one by Aesop rock, called none shall pass. and its been stuck in my head for days. i love it and i cant figure out why. i think it is the only rap song i actually passionately love. here are the lyrics and you can enjoy the funness of it:

Flash that buttery gold, jittery zeitgeist
Wither by the watering hole, water patrol
What are we, to heart huckabee, art fuckery suddenly?
Not enough young in his lung for the water wings?
Colorfully vulgar poacher at a mulch like
'I'ma pull the pulse out a soldier and bolt'
(Fine) Sign of the time we elapsed
When a primate climb up a spine and attach
Eye for an eye, by the bog life swamps and vines
They get a rise out of frogs and flies
So when a dog fights hog-tied prize sorta costs a life
The mouths water on a fork and knife
And the allure isn't right
It's gore on a war-torn beach
Where the cash cows actually beef
Blood turns wine when I leak for police
Like 'That's not a riot, it's a feast, let's eat'

And I will remember your name and face
On the day you were judged by the funhouse cast
And I will rejoice in your fall from grace
With a cane to the sky like 'None shall pass'
None shall pass, none shall pass

Now if he never had a day a snow cone couldn't fix
he wouldn't relate to the rouge vocoder bliss
How he spoke through a no-doz, motor on the fritz
'Cause he wouldn't play roll over, fetch, like a bitch
And express no regrets though he isn't worth the homeowners piss
To the jokers who pose by the glitz
(Fine) Sign of the swine and the swarm
When a king is a whore who comply and conform
Miles outside of the eye of the storm
With a siphon to lure and a prize and award
While avoiding the vile and bizarre that is violence and war
True blue triumph is more
Like wait, let it snake up outta the centerfold
Let it break the walls of Jericho. ready? go
Sat where the old cardboard city folks
Swap tails with heads like every other penny throw

And I will remember your name and face
On the day you were judged by the funhouse cast
And I will rejoice in your fall from grace
With a cane to the sky like 'None shall pass'
None shall pass, none shall pass

Okay, woke to a grocery list
Goes like this: duty and death
Anyone object, come stand in the way
You can be my little Snake River Canyon today
And I ran with a chain of commands
And a jetpack strap where the backstab lands if it can
(Fine) Sign of the vibe in the crowd
When I cut a belly open to find what climb out
What a bit of gusto he muster up
Make a dark horse rush like enough's enough
It must've struck a nerve so they huff and puff
Till all the king's men fluster and clusterfuck~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(for some reason this is my favorite line)
And it's a beautiful thing
To my people who keep an impressive wing span
Even when the cubicle shrink
You gotta pull up the intruder by the root of the weed
NY chew through the machine

[Chorus]
And I will remember your name and face
On the day you were judged by the funhouse cast
And I will rejoice in your fall from grace
With a cane to the sky like 'None shall pass'
None shall pass, none shall pass

HAHAHA! i gots bored. now you is reading the first post of my second blog on the third day of its creation. weird.
good thing im not superstitious or id probably be all freaked out for my life.

anyways, enjoy my next posts k?